he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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