I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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