i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
