how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
