so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
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