i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
