Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
