do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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