she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
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Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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