I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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