she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
