You made me cry and you don't even care
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
