Sponge bath it is.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
