Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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