ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
