My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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