Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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