he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
She told me I should be a condom model.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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