You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
