someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
It was a blind-side dick pic.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
