It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
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Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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