Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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