did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
