I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
