i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
