is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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