I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize