im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Someone signed my nipple.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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