Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
