i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
