Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
