I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
