Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
