Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
