There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
