I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
You can't just leave with hair like that
There's a naked man in my car right now.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
