Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Randomize
