My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
