She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Randomize
