He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
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So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
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I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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