why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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