A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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