Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
are you so shy because you have an std?
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
FUCK WHALES
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
