I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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