I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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