Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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