Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
The Olympian is in my bed
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize