eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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