I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
