Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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