Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
